We should not let our spiritual guards down ESPECIALLY when we are victorious. We are most vulnerable in victory. I have learned that it is when we are happy that we should pray all the more because it’s our nature to forget the Lord when everything’s going well. We tend to seek God earnestly when we are lonely and in despair.

I am currently reading Exodus. I just finished the story about the Israelites. They created a golden calf and worshiped it as their god because Moses took so long to come down from Mount Sinai. They saw all the mighty things that God did in Egypt—the ten plagues, the parting of the Red Sea and its closing in on the Egyptian soldiers, the manna and quail from heaven for forty years, the water in the wilderness, etc. They witnessed all those and still, they easily turned their hearts against the Lord just because they could not wait for Moses any longer. The Israelites were “stiff-necked” people and because of that, God wanted to consume them all. If not for Moses’ intercession, nobody would’ve escaped His holy anger and righteous judgment.

It’s easy to judge the Israelites when we read about them. However, if we are going to look inward, we will realize how similar we are to them. Just like the Israelites, our hearts are bent on sinning against the Lord. Even if we already know God and are intimate with Him, the temptation in the world and the desires of our flesh sometimes get the best of us. David was intimate with God. God promised him that He will be with him wherever he went. They had a close relationship. However, David still fell into immorality. Not only did he sin by going in to Bathsheba, but he also killed Bathsheba’s husband to cover up his sin and to have Bathsheba all to himself.

The Lord could have consumed David with his anger but He relented when David repented. We will see David pour out his heart to the Lord in the book of Psalms. He repented and God saw his remorse. God could have forsaken David but HE still called him “a man after His own heart”. What?! After the great sin that David committed He still called him that?

As with the Israelites, God relented from His anger because Moses pleaded for them. What was highlighted to me in their story is God’s mercy and compassion. Yes, God is holy and just but He is also loving.

“The law was brought in so that the trespass might increase. But where sin increased, grace increased all the more…” – Romans 5:20

God readily forgives us when we repent because He knows that we are frail. He created us and He knows our weaknesses. While some people withhold their forgiveness when we do them wrong, God readily opens His arms wide for us the moment we start running to Him. He never turns away repentant hearts. I love Psalm 103. David beautifully described God’s lovingkindness towards us.

“For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust.” – Psalm 103:14

The first thing that comes into my mind when I think about God is “loving” because that’s what He is to me—that’s how He has shown Himself to me. I am no different from the Israelites. I don’t want to hurt the heart of God but sometimes I hurt Him unwillingly. Every time I hurt Him, I hurt, too. It breaks my heart to cause pain to the one who loves me the most. We cannot overcome it on our own. We can only do it with God’s help. I noticed that I easily get irritated when I spend less time in prayer and more time in the world.

“Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” – Matthew 26:41

When I let my spiritual guards down, negative thoughts start to creep in and I do/say things I usually regret. We are open to the attacks of the enemy when we don’t spend quality time with God in prayer and Bible reading. My prayer is that God will always keep me motivated to revel in His presence and fill me with the Holy Spirit.

As for me, I will all the more boast about the Lord because truly, there is nothing I can boast about myself. Without Him, I am filthy. I only live and breathe because of Him. I only have the confidence to tell people about Him because of His grace and mercy.

We will only truly understand and appreciate the Lord’s grace when we see our filthiness, when we realize our helplessness and hopelessness. We won’t appreciate the good without the bad. We will never know how beautiful God’s salvation is if we never go through difficult moments.